Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Beat Goes On

Music moves me. I don't like stillness, I feel the rhythm and melody in every step of this thing called life. I hum a lot. I dance a lot. Our children love to dance. And yet, lately, in this new year that I simply could not wait to turn the calendar to, I cannot find the beat. The dance I am dancing at this time feels awkward, out of time... with many missteps.

Rob and I attended our third funeral this year, yesterday. Our sister in law lost her father this past weekend. In her words, he was a kind and gentle man. He absolutely was. He had struggled for some time with illness, and as much as I like to say that he is whole and healed, I also grapple with the reality that it is never the right time to lose someone we love.

My nephew is learning this lesson all too well, as he discovered yesterday that a dear friend of his, only nineteen years old had died. A mentor and friend to my sweet nephew, he met this young man through the band, through music. And the beat goes often amazes me that in the midst of our sorrow, in hard times and struggles, the dance continues. The music plays and we partner with others to sway and move to the rhythm of life. Up and down, loud and soft, life swirls around us in a cacophony of sound and energy. And even when the air around us feels thick with trouble, the beauty of notes pulled together in just the right way can shift our movements, our hearts, our lives.

Psalm 30:11 says, "You have turned my mourning into dancing, you have taken off my sackcloth and clothed me in joy, so that my soul may praise you and not be silent."

We can almost hear the music speed up, lighter, simpler; perfect for rejoicing, celebrating. Truly, there are still celebrations to be had, joy to be shared.

Gwen accounts this week of Maggie's first surgery. How beautiful the spirit of this little girl and her family; The faith and trust they so eagerly offer to others, the healing that is about to occur in Maggie's life, in more ways than we could possibly comprehend. In a time that is filled with uncertainty and sadnesses, here glimmers the hope and encouragement that God has so readily promised. Kimberley was able to announce that they have found Sophia! Both Gwen and Kimberley, women who possess servant's hearts in all that they do, are dancing at this very moment, thankful for their daughters, seeking guidance for their futures. I encourage you to encourage them as they see God's plan unfolding and their dance taking shape.

So many have inquired about my dad, thank you. We are blessed that he is feeling well, back to work and finding his groove once again. He stopped today on his way to work. Though it was a busy morning and I was anxiously packing lunches, trying to feather some mascara onto my virtually nonexistant lashes and finding a plethora of necessary items to place on our feet, I was so grateful. Grateful that he danced into my kitchen, loved on my children and placed yet another bar of notes into an already brimming composition.

I have included pictures in this post of Emily at one of her dance classes. We are invited once a year to sit and visit in her classes, it is open forum for the mamrazzi. The lighting is terrible, the room is tiny and quite congested with all of us moms in there snapping away. But, I must confess, I am continually amazed by our fluid redhead, who sparkles and shines as she twirls and jumps, sashays and glides, finding her own rhythm and meter. Most days if you asked me who it is that has taught me the most, despite my years of formal training; it is unequivocally my Heavenly Father, who has most powerfully influenced the direction in which I dance. He blessed me with two tiny dancers, who like the music I love, stir my very soul.


The Byrd's Nest said...

I am so sorry Heather that your family has experienced so much loss lately. It seems to come in spurs doesn't it? I am thankful that you are such a strong Christian woman and you are able to trust in the Lord for all of these questions that can never be answered here on earth. I am so so sorry for your tragic and hard for him. I find that in all of these things when they happen to me it only brings me closer to Father.

I love these sweet pictures of my she is growing up it seems and becoming more beautiful each day. Love you Heather.

Stefanie said...

Beautiful!! God is so wonderful, in so many ways... we are all so incredibly blessed, aren't we??
So glad to hear your dad is doing better! Praise God!!

Jboo said...

What a sweet and thoughtful post! Gorgeous photos of your beautiful girl!


Shelly and Family said...

Life has a way of throwing us off from time to time, but - in time - you'll be back to "dancing" again. I can't believe how much your Emily has grown since I first saw photos of her. My, time is flying by....Hope your weekend has some sunshine dancing around your house....

Michelle said...

Beautiful post, Heather. Your feet may dance to the beat, but your words glide on paper with their own beautiful rhythm.

I am so glad to hear your dad is doing well. And it's always great to see your beautiful little dancer.


Half Gaelic, Half Garlic! said...

Oh Heather, I am sorry for all that your family has endured these past few much loss for one precious family.

Such beautiful photos of Emily at dance class.....I am glad you had the opportunity to watch your sweet girl in motion.

Let's hope Spring brings a lot of goodness and health to your family.....thinking of you!


Missy said...

Sweet friend, I am sorry you have experienced so much loss and sadness lately. You handle it all with such dignity and grace. I love this wonderful embrace life and your girls are following in your footsteps. I love it!!! Emily is such a beautiful little girl...her smile lights up my screen!

The Things We Carried said...

Heather, Emily is so darling dancing. I am glad she has brought you joy ina season of so many losses.

Joy in The Truth said...

Gorgeous pix of Emily. Beautiful post. Summer 2010: We are SS bound!

Praying for your nephew now, and your sister-in-law, your blog friends, and of course your daddy.

While this New Year may not be the melody you expected, I know you hear His harmony and see His faithfulness through it all.

Love you friend.

prechrswife said...

What a thoughtful, well-written post...

Blessed Mom of 8 said...


These are the times I wish I didn't live so far away - I would come dance with you - sway through the tears and laughter. I understand this dance - we all hear a beat - sometimes soft and loud as you said! At the moment our music is keeping us tucked away in our home relearning to love His way all of the time.

I thoroughly look forward to the Spring and all the newness it brings with it - life and restoration! A new dance - a new sound - new music!

I pray our dance steps cross once again as the season changes and I get to love on those little ladybugs of yours! I miss all of you!

Blessings and love,

Leslie said...

Boy Heather, I really needed to hear this post. I have told you before but you sure can write. It was like you reached into my heart and turned my innermost feelings into your words. I am so sorry for your losses, I just went to my 3rd funeral this past weekend as well. I have had 6 since Christmas. My Dad's was the hardest of course, but with each passing I am reminded to live my life to the fullest, because you never know when your last day on earth will be. I agree, that this year I have just not got into my "groove" yet but I am praying that when the nice weather hits my mood will change.
You are such a sweetheart Heather!
I am so glad that your Dad is doing better, he sounds like the perfect Daddy!

Kristy said...

Heather I am so sorry for all of the losses here lately. I know that all of you are leaning on our Father for comfort and that comforts me.

Also Heather that first picture of Emily is absolutely priceless, so so pretty!!! I love all of them but that first one is just so unique.

Love, Kristy

redmaryjanes said...

Absolutely beautiful post. The beat does go on and sometimes that is so hard when there is a loss. But ultimately it is the best thing to pull us back into life.

Lori said...

Beautiful post Heather, beautifully written. I am sorry for the losses of those dear to you.
Your "fluid redhead" sure does sparkle and I am sure she is just a complete joy to watch.
Glad your Dad is doing better.

Monique said...

Hi Heather,
Just wanted to let you know that I look forward to reading your blog every day and I read it even if there is nothing new. I have an award for you and you can pick it up on my blog.
Love and hugs,

3 Peanuts said...


I am so sorry for the loss you have endured this year. I know that is hard.And so sorry you have not quite found your stride. i think we all have phases like that (I know the ned of last year was certainly one for me). Knwo that I pray for your family and for you.

Miss you,

The Byrd's Nest said...

I just wanted you to know that I miss you!!!!! I miss your words...I miss the faces of your precious angels!!


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